New book offers practical advice on setting peaceful boundaries

Dave Jetson’s new book Setting True Bo limits is the kind of book everyone can benefit from. Life can be very complicated when we let other people run our lives for us, when we don’t learn to say no, when we spend our time worrying about the feelings of others or seeking to satisfy their desires, and when we spend all of our time on their own. needs or letting them mistreat and take advantage of us. Unfortunately, most of us learn the hard way that having no limits results in a messy and usually not very happy life.

Jetson begins this book by using an example of a basketball game that has no rules or limits. The result is chaos for everyone involved. Even fans have to move to the highest stands for safety. Without limits (the rules of the game), a game of basketball is really impossible.

The same is true of our lives. Without limits, nobody is happy. Even teenagers will tell you, as Jetson points out, that they want their parents to set limits so that it is clear what is expected of them and that they feel safe knowing what the rules are.

However, setting limits is not easy. Jetson knows that many people fear setting limits because they don’t want to upset other people. However, while setting limits creates some initial discomfort, it benefits everyone involved in the long run.

Jetson first explains what the true limits are. They have three components: limits, consequences, and consistent enforcement and monitoring. It provides numerous examples to explain these components, dedicating a chapter to each one. We see how boundary setting improves marriages, improves parent-child relationships, and even helps the workplace run smoothly.

Jetson also explains what limits are not. Too often, people try to set limits but fail because they don’t understand the three components of limit setting. They mistake a threat or an ultimatum for a limit, or just set a limit without providing a consequence or following through. For example, a parent can set a limit by telling a child that if they forget to bring their homework to school again, they will have to get a zero instead of the parent bringing it to school. However, if the parent brings homework to school the next time the child forgets it, the child will not learn to respect boundaries.

Jetson explains that people often overreact when setting limits, and they do so to punish rather than create a limit that everyone can benefit from. We have to show respect to the person with whom we are setting the boundary. We cannot control someone with a limit, but we can give that person a choice. As Jetson explains, “When you create true limits, you are not controlling others or their behavior. You are allowing them to choose the positive or negative consequence for the behavior they choose to act on.”

It’s also important to be emotionally neutral when setting limits. Jetson says this emotional neutrality is often called “loving detachment.” For example, when someone violates a limit, the one who sets the limit chooses not to take the action personally and does not comply with the consequences in a punitive way depending on his emotional state. For example, if reacting from an emotional state, a parent can send the following message to a child: “If I’m in a bad mood, I might punish you; if I’m in a good mood, I might not.” Instead, if a limit is set correctly, then the consequences have been specified and can be carried out without emotion. As Jetson says, “The one who sets the limits may feel some sadness or pain if the other person does not respect a limit and yet the deep emotions are not triggered or increased.

In addition to showing us how to set actual limits, Jetson looks at why we’ve had trouble setting limits in the past. Talk about topics ranging from fear to manipulation to codependency. Codependency is ultimately the underlying problem in all boundary-setting problems. Jetson describes codependency as “a false belief that we should put other people’s emotions, needs and desires before our own. We have some resentment about this, and we continue to act as if our own feelings and needs are secondary because we have been taught that we don’t matter. ” In addition, he clarifies: “Believing that we have to live life in such a way that we do not disturb anyone is actually another way of describing codependency.” By learning to set true limits, we can begin to break the cycle of codependency that often afflicts our families.

Parents will especially appreciate the examples Jetson includes of how children can learn to set limits with other adults and with other children, including their siblings. The example you offer of a student being bullied by a teacher is one that teaches true respect for the people involved in the situation and will show children how to be assertive rather than being bullied by others.

Each chapter of Setting True Limits ends with exercise questions to help readers examine their own relationships where limits may need to be set, and then practice what they have learned by setting those limits.

Setting true limits is a phenomenal guide to creating better relationships with everyone in your life. I know this because I have used many of the techniques in this book myself as a codependent in recovery. My life is calmer, happier, more productive, and more relaxing as a result of setting limits; therefore, I cannot recommend this book highly enough. It is time for you to enjoy a peaceful life and also meaningful relationships.

Tupac alive?

Still wondering if Tupac Shakur is still alive? If you are like so many other fans, you have come to the right place. In this article you will find some of the most shocking theories that have plagued 2pac’s death since 1996. I have gathered a great deal of information that has been on the internet and compiled it in this article. I did this so that you could finally answer the question for yourself and find out if, in fact, 2pac is still alive.

After 2pac was released from prison in early 1996, he went to work with Death Row Records. As soon as he got off the plane, he was in the studio making his debut album “All Eyez on Me”. The album went diamond and is one of the best-selling hip hop albums of all time. This was a very impressive achievement and if you listened to this album you would notice some very interesting things.

Let’s start with song 13 from the first album titled “I ain’t Mad at Cha”. In the music video for this song, you’ll notice that 2pac is actually rapping about his own funeral and even shows 2pac as an angel in heaven. This is quite strange considering that the video was released only a few days after he was pronounced dead on Friday, September 13, 1996. Yes, you read it correctly on Friday the 13th, as if this day did not have any conspiracy in itself.

Moving on to the CD, if you notice song number 12 on disc 2, there is a song titled “Ain’t Hard 2 Find”. In this song, 2pac says the following: “I heard rumors that I died, murdered in cold blood, traumatized pictures of me in my final states, you know that mom cried, but that was fiction, a coward made the story go wrong.” Perhaps he was predicting the future? The album was released on February 13, 1996 exactly 7 months before he was shot.

The 7 months are quite interesting too because if you look at the first album released by Makaveli aka 2pac after his death, the title is “The Don Killuminati The 7 Day Theory”. Tupac had changed his name to Makaveli similar to the 16th century philosopher Machiavelli who faked his own death. Machiavelli had written a few books, but the most famous were “The Prince” and “The Art of War.” “The Prince” is a book on how to fake death. The second book, “The Art of War,” has the same title as the Bone Thugs N Harmony double-disc CD. On this album, 2pac makes a guest appearance on one of their songs titled “Thug Luv”. An interesting point about this album is that it wasn’t released until 1998.

Did you know that when 2pac released the album “Better Dayz”, they had released more albums than any other musician alive with seven? The point is, there have been even more since then. There have been “Loyal to the Game”, “Resurrection” and “The Life of Pac” just to name a few.

Could Tupac Shakur have faked his own death? Everyone knows that when Snoop Dogg was convicted of murder charges, his album sales skyrocketed. Maybe this was just a plan to get rich. Take a look at these lyrics to his song “Made Niggaz”, here’s what he says: “Fuck everyone who doesn’t understand my plan to get rich. Outlaw to the grave, I have a plan to get rich. Make me one. Photo “.

What do you think?

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